Lien le Storm

Today was my cousin’s birthday and the one thing he wanted I couldn’t give him. Not only that but somehow I managed to give him the exact opposite of what he wanted. I don’t think the day could of gone any more wrong truly. I tried cooking him a meal, I watched the cook for a good half hour making breakfast and it didn’t look -that- hard. She put everything in a pot, stirred it a bit and then a little later it was done. And the dessert seemed to go okay, and I put it out to set overnight.. and then when I checked on it in the morning, there was a dead mouse in it. Which is better than a dead rat at least. I fished it out and it still smelled okay, and it wasn’t like I was going to have to eat it. Next was the haddock.. which seemed to go a lot better. Until I tried cooking it. Would you believe, a cockroach ran across the table and .. of course, I screamed and tried to hit it with the pot but I just sent it flying and I -think- it landed in the dessert but I’m not sure. I tried searching through it, but.. yeah. And then, I remembered the fish.. and by then it was too late. It was burned. My cousin ate it all though. But I could tell he hated it. And then the party went wrong. And everyone was shouting and stuff happened which I can’t write about here but it wasn’t good. Really not good. All he wanted was to feel like a family, and I just messed that up.. I shouldn’t of done any thing. I should of just got him a pair of pretty high heel shoes and then none of it would of happened.

I’m trying to work out my new title and I can’t decide which is better. “Killer of Demons”, “Slayer of Demons”, or “Destroyer of Demons.” Really I landed the final blow on only one, but “Killer of Demon” doesn’t sound quite right. And I did kind of help with the others, and I figure between helping with all of twenty of the others, they must add up to another one.

He still ignores me, even though my cousin said he would apologize he hasn’t. Not even when I asked him to. So. I guess that is that. We’re not best friends any more. Or even friends. Or acquaintances. Or anything. I don’t know what to think about that. I think I want to duel him like Ari does Edvard. I figure if Ari can duel Edvard over my supposed honour without good reason then I can duel him over my honour with good reason. Except I might lose. And I don’t really want anymore scars. Or to be dead. I would rather not like being dead at all. And if I got more scars then well, no one will ever want to marry me. Which isn’t really that bad an idea at all. No one wanting to marry me. It is better than being courted as a joke. Or falling in love with someone I can’t have to find out they’re a mage. Or being propositioned like a whore by your best friend. So perhaps more scars is a good idea and I should join the Knights for that purpose, to make myself as unmarrigable as possible. And then I won’t get hurt when no one wants to court me. And I won’t be made to court someone I don’t like or love.

I AM Tubori damn it.

Love Storm

I haven’t written much, because my Cousin has had my journal for the last few weeks. He didn’t steal it though, I gave it to him to read, to prove a point and to help him understand me better. And I think it helped. Hopefully he wasn’t too offended by me calling him boring.

But a lot has happened since then and I don’t even know where to begin writing. Lots of people are dead and the whole city was flooded and Eriit is dead and he didn’t burn, he drowned and I don’t even know how to deal with that so I’m not. And I’m so mad at the Cardinal for not letting me see him or even deigning to reply to my letters. And I try not to think about Him and what it means and how he won’t likely of been cleaned of taint and I might not see him again because if I do, then it just hurts. More than almost anything.

I killed a demon. Not by myself, I had some help but still, I did it. You see, there was this circle and Vonnie broke it, and then two demons jumped out. And there was the Earl Marshall and the Grand Master there too and they were handling one of the demons and the other went for Vonnie and I couldn’t let it. Because it wanted to kill him. And I would really rather not like it if he died so I tried to stop it and I tried and I kept it at bay for ages but it was too much and it got me really bad across the stomach and then again and I fell down and it was about to kill me when Count Sevoi jumped through the roof and saved me. I got back up again but it was hard to fight and the Count kept it off of me though and it never touched me again. But I didn’t really let them know how bad I was, I just chewed on some mandrake and told a few little lies. I didn’t want to be left behind, not when we were chasing the mage that caused the flood.

So we hunted down the mage that made the flood, and I worked it out the map and the focal arc thing and where to go. So we went and we fought the mage and lots of demons and I broke the circle and the demons came and Count Sevoi kept protecting me and he nearly died. But we killed the mage, and then went back to the Orphanage and the Queen was there, it was good to see she was okay. I watched the Count during the night and made sure he was okay but then my Cousin said he was getting worse and might die which wouldn’t be fair given he saved my life. I prayed to Dav and I think he heard me because now he seems okay again. I think a lot of time Dav doesn’t really listen to me and what I want but I’m glad he decided to this time. Wish he listened to me when I asked for that big diamond choker necklace for my sixteenth birthday though. The one with inch wide one set with more diamonds than I could count.

Also my maid died in the flood. And so my room is messy and I have to dress myself except I can’t put on my dress properly so I have to wear leathers and I’m scared to wear silks again in case there’s another demon attack. So Dav, if you’re still listening, or reading my Journal (which you really shouldn’t be) I would like a new maid and a diamond choker necklace (still). Also for my cousin to not kill Edvard. That’s three things. Things come in threes right? So that’s not too over the top to ask for.

Love Storm

You spread some coin around and eventually you get a tidbit from one of the locals:’That new baron’s sleeping with the Queen and her maid – one of his stock, mind – is sleeping with the entire South Side. Ain’t be surprised if the Church ain’t none too happy with the Court, way the King is taking things, may as well declare the realm for the Cult of Transcendent Ecstasy. ‘.

I bit my tongue and stood in line
With not much to believe in
I bought into what I was sold
And ended up with nothing

This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea of a good time
This is not my idea

You thought that I would never see
What was meant for you was meant for me
I was distracted at the time
Forget about yours now what about mine

You thought I was a little girl
You thought I was a little mouse
You thought you’d take me by surprise
Now I’m here burning down your house