(The page has several lines of crossed-out ink, the writing made illegible by angry, frustrated strokes.  Eventually, however, the wrath forms into words…)

Arlais.

What I wouldn’t do for your advice; what I wouldn’t give for your counsel.  Almost half a year you have been gone, and the pain still washes over me anew each day, wearing me down like a stone on the shore at high tide.  So much has happened since your senseless and sudden passing, and yet my feelings have moved so little.  I fear that if my apathy continues, there will be nothing left, in time.

Were it not for little Edera, and the boys, and Shaylei…  And now, Shaylei is with child?  She is the only thing that tethers me to reason.  I could not bear to lose her, too.

Will I make a good father?  Or a good uncle, to your Edera?

The people I keep close – are they my source of strength, or are they my weakness?

The dreams have grown worse, of late.  I often lay awake for hours, waiting for Shaylei’s breathing to slow so that I may slip out of bed undetected.  The forge keeps me occupied, but more and more,  I have taken to roaming outside the city and hunting the beasts that lurk in the forest.  Sometimes, I think I would be more at home among them.  The city is full of liars and fools.  And as for myself?  I am but one more.  I have done everything as I should, yet I continue to don a mask of contentment, as though I think it might change who I am underneath.

Have I any right to complain, as a man of wealth and privilege?

The rain has lasted for weeks.  Some say it is the work of mages.  Perhaps it is the Lord of Springs, weeping for our sins.

The city…

It must be saved from itself.

(The following note appears to have been hastily-written across a half-sheet of soot-smudged parchment.)

To my dear sister who lives in Talfore, Farin:

Arlais, I received your note, though I was admittedly disappointed that it was merely a note, after all these months!  But, I am glad you received my letters and my early gifts, and I know you will be quite busy preparing for Yule and for the new babe, which unless I am mistaken is due at any moment now, yes?  I hope you are blessed with a girl, as I know that is your wish.  In truth, I can scarcely believe that three quarters of a year have already passed by…

I have some quick news of my own to share, though I somehow doubt that anything I have to say will come as a surprise:  I was knighted in mid-Novembris, and I have since asked Miss Shaylei le Orban to be my wife.  Much to my relief and happiness, she has accepted my offer.  Harith is due to send me a marriage contract, which is to be signed by both parties, and in a few months’ time, Miss le Orban and I will make our vows before a small group of family and friends.  Please tell me you will attend, Arlais.  I have furnished a guest bedroom in my home just for the purpose of your visit.  Also, do not fear:  an official invitation will be sent to you and your husband shortly, just as soon as the contract has arrived and has been found agreeable by Miss le Orban’s family.

Until then, know that I am eager to see you and that I miss you very much.  Happy Yuletide, sister.

By my hand this day, Decembris 1, 357,

A______ de R_____

(The following letter is written in a tight, purposeful script across a sheet of parchment smudged here and there with black soot.)

To my dearest sister, who lives in Talfore:

Arlais, I hope you will forgive me for writing again so soon without waiting for a response after my last letter.  Much has happened in the past two weeks that I wish to share with you.  And, thinking back on my previous words, I hope you will forgive me for being so… ambiguous, self-centered, and even a bit meandering.  I have included a small gift for you this time, by way of apology:  a basket of ripe apples, a container of dried apples, and three containers of dried herbs, all from the orchard behind Edessan Blades.  Which reminds me, did I ever tell you that I relocated?  I have not been back to my cottage on Montford Way in some weeks, as the Commander has allowed me the use of her home behind the shop while she is away.  It is a far more comfortable living arrangement and the location is ideal.  As well, the Town Hall Courier is only a short ride away.

I picked the ripe apples myself, but the dried apples and herbs were prepared by Miss Shaylei le Orban, whom I believe I alluded to in my previous letter.  By the time this missive reaches you, she and I will have been friends for nearly three-quarters of a year.  How much has changed in so short a span of time!  There are moments when I feel as though I have been swept up in some current, one which spins me around and takes me to unexpected places… sometimes to meet unexpected people, for better or for worse.

Now, I do not wish to alarm you, but on the 23rd of last month, there was an incident at the tavern near the shop.  The Queen’s Inn, it’s called.  I was relaxing among some fellows, when a man in a green cloak burst in, holding a young woman hostage under his knife.  He threatened to kill her if one of those present, the Baron le Orban, did not give him what he wanted.  A key of some kind, apparently, though I know not to what.  The Baron and a man in his service, named Astartes, managed to save the girl, but the cloaked figure, known as the Tenebrae, was able to escape unharmed.  The Tenebrae is widely regarded as the leader of the Brotherhood of Common Goods and is considered an extremely dangerous, ruthless man.

But here is what concerns me most, Arlais.  Before the Tenebrae escaped, he made a vile threat against Miss Shaylei’s life.  I cannot tell you how angry I was that he had made such a threat and then escaped with his own skin in tact.  As angry as I have been in some time, I can tell you.  But, looking back upon the incident, I am not sure there was much to be done for it.  Evidently, there are some who think Lord le Orban and his man should have run the Tenebrae through, even at the cost of the young woman’s life.  What do you think, sister?  Was it right to prioritize saving the hostage over capturing a known and dangerous criminal?  What if there are others who die by his hand, because he was allowed to flee unhindered?  As for myself, I doubt I would have–or could have–sacrificed the girl… but I cannot help but wonder whether that makes me a fool or perhaps merely weak.

I believe I may have been unnecessarily insubordinate to Lord le Orban, as well.  In my anger and frustration, I rounded on him afterward in a way that was admittedly… less than becoming of a Knight.  We spoke again a week or so later, and I apologized.  He told me that he didn’t think the Tenebrae would act upon the threat that was given.  Yet, he made arrangements to help Miss Shaylei secure protection, all the same.  It would seem he is saying one thing but thinking another.  Were I clever enough to understand why.  And it irks me, something he said:  that I could not possibly be more concerned about Miss Shaylei’s safety than he.  This temperamental nobleman who always seems as though he must have the last word.   If it weren’t for his relationship to Miss Shaylei and her fondness for him, I should care a great deal less about his esteem.  And I think that, if anything, the incident at the Queen’s Inn has shown me just how deeply I do care for her.

I cant bear the thought of something happening to her, Arlais.  These past few months especially, they are more than I could have imaged or have hoped for, coming to this city.  They have changed… everything.  Just as the seasons stole away the dreary winter and replaced it with the colors of spring–that is what it was like, when Miss Shaylei entered my life and became my friend.  Before, I thought only to fight for high ideals and to make up for past wrongs; now it is flesh and blood that drives me to be a better man.  Around her, I feel almost human.

In time, if and when I am promoted to Esquire, I think I will ask Harith for his permission to court Miss Shaylei le Orban.  What do you think of that, Arlais?  Of course you do not know Miss Shaylei personally, but from what little I have told you of her so far, do you think you would be supportive of such a thing?  I have already hinted to Harith that she has family in the business of trade, who are looking for southern markets.  Do you think Harith would be more apt to agree to such a union, if it brought our family wealth and northern connections?  It certainly is the Farin way, and our family has never shirked from marrying across the duchies.  But… I get get ahead of myself, dear sister.  I still worry over my relationship with Miss Shaylei’s noble cousin, who is acting as her guardian while she remains in the city.  And of course, there is the matter of my status within the Knights.  I work myself ragged trying to improve myself and to impress the Earl Marshall with my progress, but I have hardly had a glimpse of him in these past few months.  Somehow, I was able to make an audience with the new Cardinal of Lithmore, and yet, I cannot seem to get the attention of my own leader in the Knights Lithmorran.  I wonder why that is, when there are so few active Knights at present?  Perhaps there is something ill in my own timing that I should be concerned about?

Well, that is enough mulling for now, I think.  No doubt you’ve tired of it already, even with your level of patience.  In better news, I have sold three sets of armor in the past month, which is more business than I could have hoped for in such a short span of time.  It feels as though some of my hard work around the forge has finally begun to pay off.  Soon, I shall be able to send you a pretty silk shawl that you deserve and some toys for the children, lest I fall out of favor as brother and uncle, respectively.  It also means that I will be able to supply the Knights Lithmorran with adequate weapons, should they be required… but I’ll save that topic for another letter.

I miss you a great deal, Arlais.  I hope all is well and that you will forgive me for being such a self-centered sibling.  And do give your husband my best.

By my hand this Arendas, Augustus 3, in the year of Our Lord, 357,
Your loving brother,

A_____ de R______