Through the Membrane

Posted: 23rd November 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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There came a point where the dark tunnel began to have some ambient light to it, and our falling slowed down. I looked down for some reason, and I noticed that we were rapidly approaching what seemed to be some sort of wall. Jacob must’ve felt me tense up because he looked down at it, looked back up at me, and told me that it would be okay. I immediately felt the tension melt away like spring thaw.

I wanted to hold my breath when we were about to hit the floor, but Jacob held my gaze, and there was nothing that I could do but simply stare like a girl in a trance. I was surprised when we didn’t hit the floor. It turned out that it was actually some kind of membrane of some kind. We said, “I love you,” at the same time and slowly began to drift apart. He held my eyes as we slowly drifted apart and fell back into darkness.

Even now, I always see his eyes shining in the darkness. He holds me in a trance, as I seem to hold him. Just lately, I’ve also noticed that I can hear a heartbeat along with those eyes. I can’t hear it all the time like I can with my own heart.

But every once in a while, when visions of village stands and warm thatched houses cross my mind, I hear a heartbeat accompanying those eyes. And so now I am left wondering.

Are we alive?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Flashbacks

Posted: 22nd September 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized

As we descended into that river of darkness, I saw my life flash before my eyes. And I realized that it was those little moment which decided everything else.

What would have happened if I had never agreed to marry Wolfe? I did love Wolfe, but I always loved Varon more. From the very beginning I loved Varon more.

What would have happened if I had not been so stupid to wear the cloak when I was going to meet the Cardinal Kibane and was stopped by Atholos? I still do not understand why I simply did not lie or spare details.

What would have happened if I had simply had the courage to simply confess my affair and take the branding?

Why did I not simply train up and kill him myself? I think that is the largest question of all.

Why did I not simply kill him?

I could have had plenty of people that would have helped me. All I had to do was open my mouth and ask for it.

The Afterglow

Posted: 7th September 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized

In the afterglow of what was presumably my death, there was no light or tunnel. I thought of everybody I loved most: Jacob, Varon, and Talya most prominently on my mind.

When I thought of them, the darkness lifted, and I was in a tall chamber with an ancient man with a scepter. He reminded me a lot of Sekunder with the way he carried himself and the way his cloak was oily black. I could swear that he was speaking a dialect of Daravi, but I’m not totally sure.

I was overcome with a feeling of power and blurted out, “Are you the Lord of the Springs?”

He laughed. It was a kind laugh, though, as one of an adult laughing at a child that asks a silly question. He answered, “No, I am merely a judge, and pleased that you have done much better this time.”

I thought of all the things I had done in my life and answered, “Better?”

He chuckled again softly and answered, “Sins, aye, piled high to the sky. But I concern myself with the why of these things as well.” He smirks and says in a wry voice, “I am no mere child playing at knowing the will of the gods, and I understand the why matters as much as the what, sometimes even more.”

“More?” I ask softly, feeling the tears starting to come down my cheeks as the hope of avoiding damnation began to dawn on me.

He chuckles softly, and says in a kind voice, “There is no damnation but what you commit yourself to by your own deeds. Every sin a slap to your own face, every kindness a hug.” He whips his hand through the air and says, “But enough with this silly stuff. You will understand when you are older.”

“Older?” I ask, very much confused, and look down at myself. This is the first time I notice that I am no older than six or seven.

He smiles to me as I look back up. Seeing his face, he even looks like Sekunder. “You are a child in a playpen, growing and being prepared to fulfill responsibilities and lives elsewhere. Right now, you and the other younglings reside in the incubator of Urth.”

“So, basically, I’m a baby chick?” I ask incredulously.

He laughs and nods his head, “That is a good analogy, young one.”

I say grumpily, “Well, cheep cheep arien cheep.”

The man busts out laughing, holding his belly, dulcet tones ringing to the dark ceiling in the room. He even has Sekunder’s laugh. I note that the room is dark, with a single table that he is sitting at. The only light is a candle, and just at the edge of the light is the beginning of a long corridor with several doors. “I have always been fond of you and your little group mates. Always some of the best wit.”

“Group mates?”

“Did you think that you connected so deeply and were involved with so many people so thoroughly as a matter of accident? No, child, your little ring has been wreaking havoc on that planet for a long while, though this is the first time you’ve really gotten into the action.”

“Jacob? Talya? Leesa? Luke?” I ask.

He smiles, “All in on it in one way or another. Speaking of Jacob, though, you have heard of soul mates? When you are older, the urge for you to be lovers in body as well as soul will take over, but it is acceptable for you to be born as siblings at the moment.” He continues softly, “You grieve so much when he is gone because you literally have half of your soul missing.”

“But why are there so many different views on what is beyond the veil?”

“What is shown is never necessarily a lie, but you are old enough to see more of the truth than most.”

“But why? What is the point?”

He chuckles and shakes his head, “That is a question not even I can answer. The only answer I was ever given, I give to you now: everything is connected, and all things to a balance.” He smiles as he looks over my shoulder, “Hark who comes to call, little one.”

I turned around and burst into sobs. There was Jacob as he had looked when we were children. He hugs me and says softly, “It’s okay. I’m here now.”  I feel all the anger, the hate, the madness, the guilt, and everything fall away. All that is left was my love for him,  all-consuming and all-controlling.

When he begins to cry, I take him into my arms, the need to protect and comfort overshadowing every feeling of my own. He cries and says, “They said you’d be here soon, but it felt like so long. You were so sad all the time. I could feel it the whole time. Right before you came, all I did was lay in a ball and cry.”

I kissed his forehead and stroked the hair out of his eyes, “It’s okay. I’m here, and I’m better now that I am with you again.”

He smiles and replies, “I know. The man said that you were only sad because you couldn’t feel me anymore.”

Behind us, the man who looks so like Sekunder says softly, “It is time for you to go.” He adds, “Together,” quickly because Jacob hitches into a sob. The man considers for a moment. We walk a few feet down the hall, and he chooses a door, motioning for us to go on through.

“But it’s dark and scary,” Jacob argues.

I look to him, knowing that I have to be the brave one, the strong one, and urge him on. He is my pure one, and I will move Heaven and Urth a thousand times to keep him safe and happy. “It’s okay. I’ll protect you.”

“You promise you won’t leave?” he asks.

“Never.” The truest word I have uttered in any life.

We go willingly into the darkness and begin to fall. I hear the man say softly, “Good job, little one,” and shut the door softly behind us. I know that I should be terrified, I should be shrieking like mad.

But Jacob is here, Jacob is whole. And, for the moment, all I know is him and that soft, sweet song in the background that leaves me with the vague taste of rum and roses.

Deader’n a Doornail (Death log)

Posted: 5th September 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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Earl Marshall rides in from the north.
Earl Marshall slows to a halt.

You yell, “No!”

A person wearing a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin with a floor length, hooded charcoal cloak with a lined interior looks to Earl Marshall and screams, “KILL ME! ”

You yell, “Kill me. Oh sweet Lord in Heaven kill me.”

You remove your mask.
You stop using a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin.

Earl Marshall swings her leg over her mount, preparing to dismount.

Earl Marshall easily dismounts from a sleek and muscular, dapple-grey Daravi war horse.

A person wearing a floor length, hooded charcoal cloak with a lined interior writhes on the ground and yells, “No! I won’t let it happen!” In the next instant, she yells, “I’ve run mad. Do it! Don’t let me kill somebody else! ‘

Earl Marshall quickly dismounts when she seeks a person wearing a floor length, hooded charcoal cloak with a lined interior, drawing her sword. “Why do you want to die? ” She asks calmly, her sword pointed to the person’s heart.

Earl Marshall bares her sword.

You drop your hood, leaving your cloak closed.

Sophie looks up to Earl Marshall, tears in her eyes, “For the love of sanity, Lylie, it’s Annalesa back from the dead. Put me in my grave. I’ve gone arien mad.”

Earl Marshall frowns. “Sophie Delvanis. You are Annalesa as well? ” She thinks for a moment, falling silent, but her gaze remains bitterly fixed on the woman and her sword arm doesn’t falter. “I will arrest you, and then you will die. Is this acceptable?”

Sophie writhes on the ground some more, fighting herself, screaming like a mad woman. She calms down, coldness coming into her eyes, “I’ll have that blade through me before I let you arrest me.” She dons the mask again.

You wear a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin over your face.

Earl Marshall frowns, her eyes cold in return. “I do not want to kill you, Sophie. And I want to know why I should.”

A person wearing a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin replies in a cold voice, “I don’t want you to, but I’m not going to be arrested to be tortured and questioned. And I’m not Sophie. Just call me Other. That’s what she does.”

Earl Marshall nods once, her gaze fixed on the mask of skin. “May I have a confession of your reasons. ‘other’.”

A person wearing a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin writhes on the ground some more, ripping the mask from her face, “I’m the Skin Walker. I’ve run mad, Lylie, and killed so many people. ”

You remove your mask.
You stop using a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin.

Earl Marshall raises her sword. “Are you going to fight me back if I try and kill you?” She asks, sword arm twitching ever so slightly as she fights the nerves of battle.

A beautiful sunset rims the sky with streaks of purple.
The church bells ring three times, announcing the hour of vesperam.

Sophie shakes her head quickly, “I won’t. If I can’t hold off other…”Her eye twitches like mad and her gaze changes to a cold one, “I’ll fight anybody that fights me, dear Earl Marshall, even if I’m half dead already. ”

Earl Marshall takes a step to the north.

Earl Marshall lunges two steps south.

Earl Marshall lunges two steps south.

Earl Marshall lunges two steps south.

Earl Marshall lunges two steps south.

Earl Marshall sighs, taking a deep breath to compose herself before she swings a powerful underhand strike to Sophie’s chest with her sword. “Very well, you shall have your wish.” [Attack]
Earl Marshall hits your body! You have some minor scratches.

Sophie swings her axe for Earl Marshall’s stomach, rolling the whip towards the woman’s chest. She laughs hysterically in the voice of a clear madwoman. [Dual Attack]
Your hit glances off Earl Marshall’s body!
Earl Marshall has some minor scratches.

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

Baggs Ronthe rides in from the south.
Baggs Ronthe slows to a halt.

Earl Marshall swings for the side of the face, hopefully drawing blood on the left cheek. [Attack]
Earl Marshall hits your head! You are lightly wounded.

Baggs Ronthe swings his leg over his mount, preparing to dismount.

Baggs Ronthe easily dismounts from a leather armor clad, battle-mule.

Baggs Ronthe approaches Earl Marshall, closing the distance.
Baggs Ronthe is near.

Baggs Ronthe moves nearer to Earl Marshall. [Tech]

“What is the meaning of this?!” Baggs Ronthe asks as he draws in close to protect Earl Marshall
[Baggs Ronthe]

Sophie giggles as she tries to dance away from the swings. [Defense]

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

You wear a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin over your face.

“You’re going to kill me for this, Dame ab Mantiff…” Baggs Ronthe says as he reaches for his weapon. “But I’m afraid these circumstances warrant haste, and not delay of action.”
[Baggs Ronthe]

Baggs Ronthe flips a blue cotton cloak bearing the Crossed Swords on a Chalice back over his shoulder.
Baggs Ronthe bares his sword.

Baggs Ronthe falls in on the left side of Earl Marshall, making sure to do his best to step in front of any blows aimed at her

Baggs Ronthe moves nearer to Earl Marshall. [Tech]

Earl Marshall curses as Baggs Ronthe tries to protect her. “Arien, Page. I need a fighter, not a nanny.” As if to prove that point, she swings another brutal strike towards sophie’s collarbone. Her eyes twitch as she watches every blade in the fight with her dusky-grey eyes. [Attack]
Earl Marshall hits your body! You appear to be hurt.

Sophie giggles as she tries to dance away from the swings, but she groans and blood starts to become visible on her bodice. [Defense]

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

Baggs Ronthe snarls as he lunges forward in a person wearing a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin’s direction, aiming a thrust at her midsection. “I apologize Dame ab Mantiff,” he says sorely misplaced, “For not taking care of the Armory just not yet.” As he goes in for a real attack he suddenly asks a bit too late, “Should we pull our blows? Should we not render her unconscious and take her in for questioning?” [Attack]
Baggs Ronthe hits your body! You have been wounded.

Sophie twitches like mad, drops to the ground, bares her neck, and rips off the mask, “I am Annaleas Journier. I knew that Wolfe was an assassin all along, but I didn’t care until he chose to turn on the Brotherhood. I lied. He was never violent. Ever.” She turns to Baggs Ronthe and says, “If you do, I will attack until you kill me.” [Defense]

You remove your mask.
You stop using a crudely cut mask of raw, blood-stained skin.

The sunset ends as the sun drops below the horizon.

Earl Marshall lets out a cry, swinging again, this time to her upper neck. “Dav, I really don’t care. Kill her, don’t kill her. It’s all good for me. I just want her down, and now.” She slices again, giving the woman a cruel stare as she continues to strike. “Well, that was obvious. I had guessed that from the beginning, my child.” [Attack]
Earl Marshall hits your head! You look badly injured.

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

Earl Marshall withdraws a set of heavy iron manacles bound together by a bold chain and motions for Sophie to put her hands together.
(To accept the arrest, type ‘SUBMIT Earl Marshall’)

Baggs Ronthe looks confused at Sophie’s words, clearly unsettled by the entire situation. And still, he simply follows orders, rushing into Sophie with as houlder into her midsection before taking a swipe at her legs to cut off her escape. [Attack]
Baggs Ronthe hits your legs! You have been mauled.

Earl Marshall pulls out her manacles, doing a low swing to the stomach as she tries to put them on her. “You will be punished, Other,” She says bitterly, her sword and her manacles in hand. [Attack]
Earl Marshall hits your body! You look pretty mangled.

Baggs Ronthe steps forward to protect Earl Marshall from harm.
Sophie swings for Earl Marshall’s body with both axe and whip, blood starting to absolutely coat her bodice. “I’ll kill you before I submit to arrest to be questioned.” She spits at Earl Marshall. [Dual Attack]
Your hit glances off Baggs Ronthe’s body, grazing a navy and white jerkin bearing Crossed Swords on a Chalice! It appears to be in good condition.
Baggs Ronthe has some minor scratches.

Baggs Ronthe growls at the blatant disrespect of Earl Marshall. “You will show more respect!” Though he seems troubled as he keeps looking at Sophie’s face, seemingly at odds with what he sees in front of him. Still, rushes at the madwoman, feinting to the left before pivoting on his heel, arcing his sword toward’s her midsection. [Attack]
You sure are BLEEDING!
Baggs Ronthe hits your body! You appear to be crippled from your injuries.

Earl Marshall curses as Baggs Ronthe is hit, and goes into a different level of fury. She swings harshly towards Sophie, slicing across mid-chest without faltar. Her teeth are clenched, and there is a bit of blood on her shoulder, but not much. [Attack]
You sure are BLEEDING!
Earl Marshall hits your body! You are impaired by your injuries.

Sophie looks to Baggs Ronthe and nods her head. “Aye, so I will.” She kneels back down and bares her neck again, though she twitches like mad all over. “I don’t know how long I can hold off other. Hurry, please. Kill. me. I beg of you.” [Defense]

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

Baggs Ronthe aims a thrust to the foot, hoping to maim and hinder the woman even further. He hesitates for a moment glancing in Earl Marshall’s direction. “Orders, Lady Earl Marshall?” He looks to Sophie with nothing but sorrow as he stares at the twitching woman. [Defense]

Earl Marshall curses again, swinging her sword at her chest in an attempt to kill. “She is crazed and a murderer. You may continue fighting.” [Attack]
You sure are BLEEDING!
Earl Marshall hits your body! You are seriously impaired by your injuries.

Sophie nods her head to Earl Marshall and says, “Aye, so I am,” still kneeling. She twitches madly as she goes on with, “I’m sorry.” Looking to Baggs Ronthe, she offers, “Killing me is a mercy at this point. The red haze in my head…it’s been there ever since the Hillbeast. I couldn’t…I couldn’t protect them. Anybody. Put an end to it. Please.” [Defense]

NEW COMBAT ROUND!
You are still engaged in combat.

Baggs Ronthe closes his eyes, at odds with his current and future actions. He lets out a cry, perhaps of rage, confusion, as he continues a relentless attack, every aim towards Sophie’s neck. “I’m sorry!” he cries out. [Attack]
You are incapacitated!
You are incapacitated and will slowly die, if not aided.
Baggs Ronthe hits your head! You are seriously impaired by your injuries.

[RPxp: none] [HP:crippled MV:rested P:crawl] (cloaked) Drawn (Diremote)

You say OOCly, “If we’re taking requests, finish me like Mortal Kombat.”

Trouble in Paradise

Posted: 3rd September 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized

Talya’s back, and I’m happy about that.

I wonder how she hasn’t figured out who I am yet… Problem is that, just like I thought, there’s problems with other friends close to me. It’s romance problems that have even reached the gossips.

Blacked out again and woke up with bad wounds. Blacked out yet again not too long ago and the wound had gotten worse. I might actually need to go to the hospital or something. Find somebody to bandage it. I went to visit Wolfe’s grave again the other day. Just like every time I go, I am met with the unimaginably strong feeling that he’s just kind of not there. I still look for Sekunder’s grave.

Black Out

Posted: 30th August 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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I blacked out and woke up in the park. I started in the Blind Horse and woke up in the park. I never black out when I get drunk. Ever. Even sugar cubes usually leave me with enough memories to piece things together.

Talya was angry with me. She got Orban to patch me up from some stab wound. I…I don’t know what to do about it or what happened. I just…I don’t want to turn out like Luke.

Talya’s Rules

Posted: 28th August 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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1) If it doesn’t harm anyone, do whatever you wish and you commit no sin.

I have broken this so much that I might as well be an arien mage my heart is so black.
2) The purpose of life is Happiness;to enjoy oneself. Helping others to attain to that purpose is a great virtue. Merely avoiding harming others is not enough, you must actively try to make the world a happier place, both for yourself and others.

I think I may have done the opposite, actually.
3) Love is the greatest happiness. Romance should be revelled in, esteemed, and be the focus of one’s life, both for yourself and for others.

I understand the duty to protect physically and from torture. That is all that I understand, and that is why I have failed, and failed miserably.

Him. Of all people: him. How many people that I care about would gut me like a fish if they knew about it? Talya will not bat an eye at others, but him? I have my doubts.

The Red

Posted: 27th August 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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I’m starting to slip, and hard, I think. Varon is likely dead, and Lord only knows where Talya is. Lien knows, Orban knows, so there is that weight off my head. My identity is pretty much an open secret, but I’ve always heard that an open secret is better than a closely guarded one. Open secrets weigh less on people’s minds, so they feel less of a compulsion to tell.

My mind is a constant haze of red, and I want blood over the simplest things. What I did to Ashe…when I came out of it, I was horrified beyond words. I…what if I’m going the same way as Luke? He said that he used to black out a lot. If I start to black out, I may just have to get myself confined to the tower for people’s protection as much as my own.

Just a few days

Posted: 24th August 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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In the course of a few days, everything changed. My outlook on life, my knowledge of the history of this place, the people that exist. I’ve been taken out of what I refer to as ‘the ring of fire’, the ring of knowledge gathering that seems to have gone on in this town with Orban at the helm. I don’t know why I was ever included in the first place. He probably suspects me as the leak, which would make sense in the grand scheme of things being Tubori and all, but it really wasn’t me as the leak.

But I know a few things more now, and the world suddenly makes more sense than it has in a good, long time. Besides, I’ve got some friends now. Some good friends, and that’s more than I’ve had in a long, long time. But maybe the trick to having a peaceful life is to simply not let yourself get too happy because things blow up in your face when you do. I’m starting to worry because I’ve not seen Talya or Leesa in about a month…

As for the two major things on my mind:

My rage and hate should probably channel into hunting the Defiler.

I want to reach out, I want to tell her. Badly. But I can’t take the very real risk of her babbling to the wrong people. Besides, I have the sneaking suspicion she already knows.

Posted: 22nd August 2012 by Sophie in Uncategorized
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