I see messages composed incorrectly all the time, even among seasoned players, so here’s a bit of quick clarification:
In your “Message” and “Room” fields, you can use /recip to refer to the receiving character, so that third parties on the other end see only what they should — the recipient’s short desc or remembered name, as remembered by THEM.
No, not /recipient, not /Joebob, not /Kinaed, not /laudate.
It’s /recip. Just like that.
(There may be some plans to update the code so that /recipient works, but as of the time of this writing, it does not.)
Use deliver <object> to attach an object to your message. Don’t worry: if the recipient doesn’t accept your message, you’ll get your object back.